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lyrics

Dinner party has run dry,
I roll my eyes up to the sky.
They’re talking ‘bout their kids again,
I wish that I was fucking dead.

Jonathan has started walking;
beat his brother, first to talking,
Jonty has got his first teeth,
he even bit Dave’s fucking niece.

Gertrude’s passed with flying colours,
Daisy made the hockey team!
Lucy’s reading maths at cambridge;
Isabelle’s designed a drawbridge.

I need stuff to dull this nightmare,
Burnt through all my drink too quickly,
host says that he’s got some more,
but big surprise, it’s fucking wine.

I hate wine so shut your whining.
Stood there blanc look on your face,
think you’ve got expensive taste.
I hate wine so shut your whining.
chaise lounge fucking overused,
this alcohol can’t be your muse!

You make me see red!
It’s time to go to bed.
I’d rather drink some beer, ‘cause wine tastes queer
and save my teeth from going grey!

Vineyard dreams up in your head,
just move to france you fucking pleb!
Leave the grapes where they belong,
it’s where your problems all stem from!

Dave says: “Clay makes wine taste better!”.
Read it in his wine newsletter,
stacking mags up to the sky,
he makes me want to fucking cry.

There’s more to life than pinot grigio:
A finer hoppy amber ale!
Or maybe double IPA?
That would make my fucking day!

I love ales so shut your whining!
Sours are my favourite,
I’ll even fucking savour it!
I love ales so shut your whining!
Frambois, stout, and porter too!
Something bitter makes me poo!

credits

from Working Class Artists, released October 9, 2020
Jonty
Anthony
Vinny
Mark

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Working Class Artists England, UK

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