Dad, I’m sorry I was out so late,
I was in a TESCO carpark,
slurping up the cock of a Corsa driver,
told me he’d drive faster,
his 8-ball stick is dripping wet with my saliva!
Oh my gosh dad he’s just so fucking fit!
He removed his muffler just to see my tits!
This teenage fuck boy; gave him such a suck boy,
he’s stole my horse-girl heart.
Mum, I’m sorry I was out so late,
I was in a stable, balls deep in a posh bird
now my jeans stink of mud, and sludge, and horse shit.
Can’t run that damn machine can you wash them for me please?
Check it out bruv, I slammed my suspension,
the only danger to me now is a fucking speed bump!
Stomp on the accelerator, tyre squeal and I’m away
I’m off to go and honk my horn at underage girls!
My first memory is riding on a pony
but money don’t matter, I like chavvy boys called Tony!
They’re dangerous, exciting; in a council house.
They smell of Lynx Africa, and I love the way they cheat on me!
Techno, Clubnight, rock up in my Adidas.
Fresh fade, gold chain, mate that beat is fucking class!
I’ll be sucking down balloons filled with laughing gas,
now my wallet’s empty, where the fuck’s my dole cheque!?
Horse Girls and Car Boys are the same breed,
their pathetic lives, no surprise, it makes my eyes bleed!
Horse Girls and Car Boys; a cunt stampede!
‘Bunch of useless wankers, same problem, different steed!
X4
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